"CONSUMER DISTORTS" DUMPS ON FORD & DETROIT AGAIN

[Get the latest "Truth With Speedzzter here]

THE FOLLOWING IS OPINION COMMENTARY BASED ON MEDIA REPORTS.

The most useless magazine in American automotive publishing . . . the "Tokyo Rose" of the automobile press . . . the shameless purveyors of snooty, self-selected, Asian import bias . . . Consumer Reports (R) has done it again.

Apparently subscribing to the "kick'em when they're up, kick'em when they're down" philosophy, the probably tie-dyed, Left-Coast wingnuts at Consumer Reports (R) have reportedly produced about a billion dollars worth of freebee shilling for Team Japan disguised as "journalism" in the fetid "Auto issue" of the Consumer Union's worthless rag.

(Because Consumer Reports (R) arrogantly disdains all advertising, its decades of evangelism for Asian cars cannot be fairly described as "advertising." However, if the Japanese invaders had to buy the same amount of influence among the automotively-ignorant, "appliance motorist" set, it would cost probably a billion dollars in "Truth With Speedzzter's" OPINION.)

Detroit's one category win came in the area of full sized pickup trucks, with the Chevrolet Avalanche edging out the redesigned Ford F150.

Of course, the "appliance motorists" at "Consumer Distorts" apparently gushed again like school-aged fanboys over a host of America-killing, trade-deficit-increasing, Japanese invader cars.

What else is new?

Too bad Obama forgot to put these "geniuses" on the Car Czar team . . . .

Possibly to maintain some illusion among the terminally weak-minded that they're not lock, stock and barrel "in the tank" for Asian imports, "Consumer Distorts" crackerjack Director of Automotive Testing David Champion [sic] had to admit that "Detroit's three auto makers have made 'substantial, incremental improvements in the reliability of their products.'"

Old "Champ" then had to admit that "Ford has made the most progress, especially in their new models" but he then nitpicked FoMoCo, saying it needs to "jazz up their products which now suffer from "so-so styling."

Does "Champ" need a seeing-eye dog? Does he even look at the brain-numbingly boring, "blandtastic" sleds that the Japanese automakers push and dump like baby-boomer crack cocaine onto the American market?

IN THE OPINION OF "TRUTH WITH SPEEDZZTER," Consumer Reports (R) is an embarrassment as a source for automotive data. It is a disgrace to America. Consequently, it will be read like "the Bible" by thousands of car-hating, Detroit-loathing Obama voters. Many of these same blind-eyed, bleeding-heart hypocrites will mouth fealty to the organized labor movement and maybe even weap for the decaying ruin that that four decades of federal meddling and predatory trade practices have created in MOTOWN, as they motor along in their non-union Japanese invader "wondercars."

Some of the rest of us will spend the inflated cost of the wretched "auto issue" on a ticket for the film "Gran Torino."


DISCLAIMER FOR CONSUMER REPORTS' (R) LAWYERS: Consumer Reports (R) is a registered trademark of Consumers Union (or whomever holds it -- and it should be obvious to everyone who reads English, "Truth With Speedzzter" does not hold it and would use it for toilet paper if it did). Ergo, it's likely the Legal Services Department of the so-called Consumers Union will get their all-natural-fiber, union-made, eco-friendly, designer panties in a bunch over the mere appearance of the words "Consumer Reports (R)" herein. However, any reference to that reeking waste of paper "Truth With Speedzzter" OPINES is more properly described by knowledgeable automobile enthusiasts, hot rodders, and muscle car lovers as "Consumer Distorts" is used herein under the FAIR USE DOCTRINE of U.S. Copyright law.

The comments herein are OPINION (just like the broadsides that Consumer Reports (R) prints against American vehicles) and as such they are protected by the FIRST AMENDMENT to the U.S. Constitution.

"Truth With Speedzzter" will afford equal time to any rebuttal from Mr. Champion or any of the alleged "automotive journalists" at Consumer Reports (R) to respond to any comment made herein. In other words, waste your time and your we-don't-accept-any-filthy-advertising money suing someone else.